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Unpopular Geeky Kid At School To Movie Star - Build Self Confidence

Wednesday, 17 January 2007

How does one go from being the unpopular geeky kid at school to turn popularity into a full time profession? Difficult? No, not really - it just took time and effort - here's how I did it... 

At the start of Primary School (9 years old to 12 y.o.) my Mother and Father got a divorce, I moved with my Mother to a new suburb and I started school not knowing anyone - also my Mother got me into the better School in the area but everyone else near me went to the other school. 

Basically I was friendless and knew nobody, nobody in my area went to my school and on top of that I was also a shy kid. I befriended a couple of red headed twins - Anthony and Jason Wingett - years later these kids were to dramatically reshape my life and give me the direction I now travel in.

Throughout this time period I made other friends at school and then came time to go to high school (13 y.o. to 18 y.o.) my Mother once again made a big effort to get me into the better school in the area - again guess what? Yes, all my old friends and everyone in my area went to a different school.

Again dropped into a new environment almost completely friendless, except for one other boy that I knew previously, while everyone else seemed to know each other and travel in packs (as scared school children do).

Again I made friends in this new environment in the first year. Then to start it all again my marks in class had me re-assessed to a higher class in almost all my subjects. Again in with a new bunch of friends, getting used to this now - unfortunately most these kids were from higher wage eanrer families and were a little different, definitely quieter, more studious, sometimes a little snobby - I did not fit i, I was a little too wild.

My idea of fun at that age was to go bush for the day, take my bicycle and go riding around the bush, see what I could find, enter the army firing range nearby, go diving for golf balls at the local range and sell them back to the club for lunch money - a knock about sort of kid, definitely not one to stay indoors all day.

Then I discovered computers.

With computers came my introduction to Role Playing and War Games (such as D&D, Aftermath, Gamma World, etc).

From knock about to geek in a matter of months.This did not stop me from going to the Wingetts house on weekends and playing D&D then going outside and running around shooting air rifles at each other.  I also kept the physical side up as I discovered Orienteering (running around the bush (forest) finding locations on a map then running to the next - winner determined by correctness of answers at locations + time).

So my circle of friends became an older group of much more mature acting older students - plus I was tall and skinny and was involved in an unpopular sport.

Perfect target for the bullies at school.

I was unpopular with the 'in crowd'.

I did not really see this as a problem as I was enjoying myself, until I discovered girls - then it became a problem. If I was the unpopular guy then I would never get a good looking girlfriend.

There were even jokes about this in class directed at me. I remember one time a teacher stepping in and saying "there is someone in the world for everyone" - even though he did not say this to me it was directed at me due to the previous conversation. Unfortunately this made things worse as the other kids in the class immediately decided that other someone for me was the tall, quiet, shy, not attractive red headed girl in that class.  I was tormented about this for weeks afterwards.

(HA! If only they could see the girlfriends I have had since then, we'd see who was laughing)

This all changed when I was 16, I wanted a girlfriend, no - that's wrong, I wanted to choose my girlfriend, I wanted to be able to go up to any girl and ask her out and be assured that she would say yes.

I was skinny, had a lot of pimples, dressed not so well, had a bad, almost bowl style haircut and generally quiet.

Something had to change, and the world was not going to change for me, but I did not know what to do.

One day at the Wingetts house I saw Anth and Jay flexing their biceps - holy cow! What have you been doing? They were massive (14" looks massive when you have 11" arms - yes I had 11" arms), they told me they were working out and they were going to watch a movie tomorrow that had the World Champion workout guy in it....

Conan The Destroyer was the movie and of course that World Champion was Arnold Swarztenegger!

I wanted to be like him, but I never believed I could. BUT I did believe I could get 14" arms like the Wingetts - the next day I was at the gym signing up.

I put on 20kg in the first 3 months - I more than doubled or tripled all my lifts in that time and I started to gain something I had never really had - Self Confidence. For the first time I felt like I was in control of my life.

I believe being in control of yourself and your life is the most important thing towards happiness.

When I gained Self Confidence is when my life started to change.

I stood up for myself and threw a bully across the room - silencing him and his friends for ever. I was invited to join the Rugby Football Team and the Basketball Team. The national league Basketball coach noticed me and took me for private lessons.

One of the popular, and more unruly, popular guys invited me to come up and sit with the popular kids one lunch time, he also pulled out a pair of hair clippers and I got a reasonably stylish haircut that day.

From here I was invited to parties, I also started to go to the beach (as I was no longer ashamed of my body).

Fast forward two years.

I knew all the hottest girls on the beach, I also now worked at the hottest nightspot in town, all the girls knew me and I knew them. I was enjoying my life immensely.

Self Confidence Is The Biggest Determining Factor Of Your Life - Work On It

For me I got self confidence from the gym and bodybuilding, success in other areas of my life taht flowed on from this just increased it. To the point where I am now rather cocky - I WILL be a movie star because I want it, no other reason, no ifs and no buts, this thing I will have because it is what I want and I know I can do it.

Having Self Confidence lets other people have confidence in you too, I say I can do a job and people see that I believe it, this helps them believe that I am the person for the job or role. They trust me to do what I say I can.

These effects flow on, as you gain more and more success you gain more and more confidence, more confidence means more success, more success means more confidence, etc. 

I know other guys who got Self Confidence from success at work, in business, sports, or even had it installed by their parents.

Whatever it takes to develop your self confidence do it.

Body image is a good place to start, you do not have to look like Arnold (or me for that matter) just get fit and healthy looking, being proud of your body is a must in the overall scheme.

Put 100% effort into what you do and become a success.

Find your Self Confidence and life will give you what you want - or to be honest - you can take what you want from life. 

 

P.S. Movie Star? Me? Not yet. I have to make these next three movies and I'll be a South East Asian movie star 3 times over. I bet none of those kids back in class would ever believe it.

 
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